Ahhh!

The owl. Will not. SHUT UP!

I ask of you: However can one be expected to sleep with an owl constantly, insistently, hooting nearby? Whoo-who-who-whooo-Whoo! And it goes on. He hoots. Pauses a minute. Then repeats. And it's a great horned, which means we can't make it stop. No bb guns this time. Not that I could even see it cause it's dark already. But grrr. I want to sleep now. But as soon as the silence settles, that infernal owl starts up again. He's been at it for several hours! It's almost as if he's waiting for someone who's really really late, or he's a sentinel, relaying the safe signal every few seconds, or he's sending messages to heaven knows what. But I'm afraid I'm going to go insane. Or at least go sleepless. Stupid owl. Please, Mr. Owl, please, for the love of all that is holy, or even for the love of all that is not holy, if you prefer, please just SHUT UP!!
(said while muttering...) I. Hate. That. Stupid. Owl.

Don't sue me. You'd hate him too if he was doing this to you. You know you would. Or, if you didn't hate him, at least you'd want to STRANGLE HIM WITH A THIN PIECE OF FISHING WIRE SO THAT HE WOULD NEVER DO THIS AGAIN! Or you'd catch him in a really strong cage and take him to a doctor and have his "whoo"-ing mechanism removed. Or you'd just slap him. Or maybe you're more tolerant of annoying birds than I and you'd just smile and say "nice birdie. Please be quiet. I am trying to sleep." But I am NOT tolerant of annoying birds. Living with a pet goose has cured me of that. I say I want to strangle the owl, and I do. Or just shoot it. That would be easier and less dangerous for me. And it would help me practice my marksmanship. It would be, so to speak, killing two birds with one stone. Don't you dare laugh. That was horrible of me, bad llama.

OWL = EVIL

GRRRR...